You made a stupid ass decision.
You made a selfish decision to say something you should never say, as your team was struggling with the first match they’ve ever taken a hard loss on. And you still find the time to criticize your team in your apology thread, despite the fact that none of them took an easy way out and quit on each other, like you did. I’ve been on the receiving end of absolutely getting obliterated in a match, even including a grand finals match on Upward (UGC S20 Grand Finals vs Jammers where andrew went off for 800 dpm in a half and we got hard held on first), and I didn’t go out and quit on my team, or say something that has so much history of being hateful, a word that is so utterly vile. Something that you immediately defended yourself after, by claiming you weren’t actually a racist.
Take however long your ban is from RGL to do some serious self-reflection. Don’t come back until you have proven that you are actually capable of change, because this apology thread means nothing. Results and change mean something. Don’t make a blanket statement on the forums trying to seek pity from the larger RGL crowd, go and apologize directly to those who you have both offended, and sabotaged, then go and focus on what you must do in order to improve as a person. You must be better than this.